Before, my life felt like I was always running a labyrinth. Always hearing a screaming baby in a distant place, never able to reach it, constantly yanked in different directions, racing against a time frame that didn't exist. But now the whole thing has been razed, disintegrated.
When it rains, it pours. When an Angeleno leaves LA for any subjectively significant time, one’s re-entry is provisional until they’ve seen their therapist. I…
It's been a non-stop shit-show of people telling me I'm so amazing and deserve better then turning around and letting me down by choice. And the impact really can't be summed up in a paragraph or two.
But on the other days, the ones I can push through, the healed (or healing) part of me asks “Why don’t others believe they deserve me? Why do they fear what they want?”
Why I am taking a break but not really going anywhere.
As a writer I have always believed in trusting the reader. If a writer fails this, the prose suffers. It is where walls of text and overwrought exposition is born and storytelling goes to die.
Things I couldn't have learned anywhere else.
Your pet will always depend on you, fully, and that’s honestly a source of the joy they bring to our lives. Someone who always needs you feels so good to care for. We never stop parenting them; they never leave the nest. Despite their aging and intelligence, dogs, in particular, develop about the same mental capacity as a four-year-old. They truly are always children.
Most people who read this and already know me know very well what I'm about to talk about: Czar died on the morning of November 5. And yet, I am going to push forward with my projects as a way to cope and find my new normal.
In September 2019, I wrote about my dog’s current state of health and how it was declining. During the first week of October, after a…